Feeling left out is hard, especially for teens. It hurts because teens care a lot about friendships and fitting in. As a parent, you can help them feel better and grow from this.
This evening, I watched my child in pain as she struggled to feel included and like she belongs. Her best friend abandoned her, and she feels all alone. Living in a rural community makes it even harder, as there are fewer opportunities to connect. I came across some ideas that might help support her through this tough time. I know I am not the only parent that struggles with their teen in this way, so I thought I would share some things that I have learned.
Why It Hurts
Teens feel excluded because:
- They want to belong.
- Their brains are more sensitive to social rejection.
- Social media makes it worse by showing what they missed.
Signs to Watch For
Your teen may feel left out if they:
- Seem sad or lonely.
- Avoid family or friends.
- Get angry or upset more often.
- Struggle at school.
How You Can Help
- Listen and Care: Let them share their feelings. Say things like, “I understand that this is really tough for you.”
- Encourage New Friends: Help them join clubs, sports, or activities where they can meet new people.
- Limit Social Media: Remind them that what they see online isn’t the full story. Encourage breaks from screens.
- Teach Resilience: Remind them of their strengths and that being left out doesn’t define their worth.
- Be There: Make home a safe, loving place where they can always feel supported.
When to Get Help
If your teen stays sad or anxious for a long time, a counselor or therapist can help them feel better. contact the Foundry in BC for free services Phone & Online Chat – Foundry
Final Thoughts
Being left out hurts, but it’s something every teen faces. With your support, they can learn to handle it and grow stronger. Show them love, listen, and help them find new opportunities to connect with others.
For a great article on this topic please see When Your Daughter Isn’t Invited, Why Being Excluded Hurts